There are other ways we define ourselves besides our relationships and our jobs. One of these is defining ourselves by our pasts.
I had a friend who had been told all her life she was stupid. If you went back and looked at her report cards, they were average, but she had absorbed what she had been told. It took a lot of hard talking by myself and others to get her to attempt to go to college at 43, but once she did, she made it through not only college, but grad school, and became a teacher, her dream since childhood. What artificial limitations do you believe about yourself? What’s stopping you from living your dreams?
I was overweight as a child and a teenager, and for years I thought of myself as fat even when that stopped being true. I allowed that and the fact that I am an introvert, to hold me back from fully participating in things. We need to develop a strong enough self-image to allow us to live life without the fear of rejection making us timid.
Last for this time, there may be something truly horrible in your past – child abuse, serious illness, neglect, drug abuse, or any number of traumatic things. Again, defining yourself by the past – whether good or bad – leaches the present of its power and promise. Try to begin to think of yourself, not as a victim, but as a survivor. Be a cancer survivor. Be an abuse survivor. We don’t always have a choice in what happens to us. But we always have a choice in how we remember the past. Tell yourself a new story about what has happened to you. You are a survivor. You are a worthwhile person. Believe it!
You’ve hit upon something very important here, Karen. Our stories define us in huge ways. They are the lens through which we see the world. It’s crucial to make sure we can tell our own stories and not rely on those that other people, the media, or the culture at large tell us about who we are!
Comment by shari burke — April 30, 2008 @ 7:51 am |
Hearing the real Ava (from movie the Freedom Writers; her real name is Maria) speak to a group of educators, she mentioned; “When you tell your story, you set someone free.” I think this applies to not only the audience, but yourself. Telling your story allows another to relate, and understand you better, understand themselves better, and allows them to share their feelings about the story, share a similar fact, and help the group grow. That’s a YEAH YEAH Out Loud right there!
Comment by Kathy — May 6, 2008 @ 8:43 pm |
Link to the Original news Article “Self-Esteem, part 2″ In conjunction with; You’re a Worthwhile Person in More Ways Than a Million by Simeon Johnson … Lifts spirits, improve self-esteem, and replenish hope.
For that reason, it is very much worthwhile. Readers will benefit from this story exponentially!
Comment by Simeon Johnson — May 26, 2008 @ 6:30 pm |